Journal

3/30/09
Having three little boyz, all under the age of three is definitely challenging. Aiden and
Benjamin, you are absolutely on the go from the moment you wake up until the moment you go to
sleep.

Aiden, you have stopped wanting to take naps and we have to fight you to take them. You
usually lay up on the top bunk bed playing with whatever toy you can sneak up there. You have
learned to say "cheese" when Mommy takes your picture. Now, if you start to look at the
pictures that I am taking, you have this smile on your face that is caused by you saying
"cheese".

Benjamin, I never know from one minute to the next what you are going to do. One moment,
you are completely disobeying and the next, you are the most helpful little man there is. Your
definitely a challenge but I love you all the same.

Both of you boyz absolutely love your brother Donovan. You are constantly doting on him and
smothering him with hugs and kisses. You are very protective.

Donovan, you are learning to sleep in your own bed. We put you in there for naps and at
bedtime. You are pretty good at naps but bedtime....well, you rip your Mommy and Daddy's
heart out by crying. It is very difficult to hear you crying like you do but you need to sleep in
your own bed. You are cutting teeth. You are getting six teeth in right now you poor baby.
Mommy is giving you some herbal teething tablets and some Tylenol occasionally. It helps but
what works best is being held by your Mommy or Daddy.

You boyz went for a tractor ride with Daddy today when Mommy was staining your play center.
You all love going for rides. You like to take turns driving. You giggle and laugh the whole time.
Mommy got some pictures so you remember it when you get older. You boyz are so adorable! I
love you so much. You make every day worth living.

3/2/09
Well boyz, I never know what to expect from you. Today, when Mommy was getting ready for
work, you came to me with the phone telling me that Daddy had called. I called and spoke with
Daddy and he told me he was running late. Next moment, the doorbell rings. I grab a robe and
answer the door to a Police Officer. He advises me that he needs to check the premises to
ensure that we are safe. I initially laugh and tell him he has the wrong house but he remains
persistent. He tells me that there has been not one, but four phone calls from this home to 911. I
am absolutely stunned. Apparently, you boyz have learned how to dial 911. I can't wait until
your Daddy gets home to tell him what you learned today. My amazing little boyz.....sometimes
what you do is so adorable.....then other times, well not so much.

4/15/08
Donovan, we are putting cereal in your breast milk and you slept for the first night all the way
through. This was helpful because Mommy is exhausted. You boys are tag teaming me. I get
your brothers down for a nap and then you are awake and wanting to be fed or held. This sleep
is definitely appreciated.

3/16/08
Donovan, you are such a great baby. You only cry when you are hungry or have a wet diaper.
You coo and smile all the time. What a joy you are. I love you!

Aiden and Benjamin, you are such great big brothers. You smother your brother Donovan in
hugs and kisses daily. You are so cute....you come up to Donovan and raise your voice and say
"Hi". Too cute! You are both starting to talk so much more.

2/16/08
Today Mommy gets to go home. I am so excited I can barely wait for the transporter to arrive.
I have missed your brothers so much that I want to cry. Two days is far too long to be away
from my boyz. I can't wait to get you home and introduce you to your brothers~they are going
to be so excited to meet you. They have been looking at Mommy's belly for the last nine months
and pointing and talking to you Baby Donovan. I am anxious to see how they react to you.

Donovan, your brothers are so excited when we get home that we can barely get in the door
before they are touching you. Mommy got her kisses but your brothers are much more interested
and fascinated with you.

2/14/08
Today Donovan, you came into the world. There are no words for how Mommy feels. My baby
Donovan, I love you so much. I will never forget your first cry. As soon as you were out of
Mommy's tummy, Daddy went over to the layette to see you. He got to cut your cord and see
you first. You were protesting being out of Mommy's tummy by crying and I was crying too. I
was so happy that you were finally here and healthy. Mommy got to see you before they took
you to the nursery for a bath and thorough check-up. What a beautiful baby you are. You are
absolutely perfect. You look just like your Daddy. Both Mommy and Daddy cried at your birth.
Donovan, you are a child that was created out of pure love. Mommy and Daddy had to work so
hard to conceive your brothers Aiden, Benjamin and Cooper and we never thought that we
would be pregnant again. So, when all Mommy and Daddy did was share their love for each
other, and out of that you were created, well you can definitely see why we consider you our
love child. Now, this doesn't mean that we love your brothers any less, it just means that this
situation was so special to Mommy and Daddy and one of the reasons why we chose February
14th as your birthday. We hope you don't mind this as you get older. It was a much discussed
topic and our rationale was that you could grow up with everyone saying that your birthday was
either so many days before or after Valentines Day or on Valentines Day.

This birthing experience was completely different from that of your brothers. Daddy and
Mommy got up at 6 a.m. to get ready to go to the hospital. We packed the car and headed
down to Tampa General at 7 a.m. for a scheduled C-section at 10:30 a.m. Mommy cried when
she left your brothers Aiden and Benjamin. This was the first time that Mommy had ever been
away from her boys for any period of time. Aiden, you cried and held your arms out when I
left, absolutely tore my heart out.

Daddy and Mommy got to Tampa General a little late; traffic was horrible. It was a cold
February morning. Mommy and Daddy talked the whole way down about how excited we were
that we were going to have another little boy in our house and how different this whole
experience has been. We checked into labor and delivery and began preparing for your birth.
One of Mommy's favorite times was when your Daddy put his scrubs on. Daddy definitely looks
sexy in scrubs! Rrrrr. We were in the holding area for a little longer that what was expected
because of a few emergencies. We were watching the clock and counting the minutes. 10:30,
10:35, 11:00, 11:30.....finally, time to go. I remember thinking "Wow, I can't believe that in a
short period of time, I am going to be holding my baby Donovan in my arms!"

Mommy had a spinal with your delivery. The anesthesia resident had some difficulty getting my
spinal and immediately after injecting Mommy, her blood pressure dropped. Poor Daddy, he
was out in the waiting area, expecting to be in for your birth in a couple of minutes and he was
out there for a half an hour. After my pressure returned to normal and Daddy came in, your
birth began. Surgery started at 12:05 and at 12:17 you entered the world. You were ready to
come out sooner, but they needed someone to "catch" you so we had to wait a couple of
minutes. Finally, someone came and you came out! Happy Birthday Donovan! I can't wait until
I can hold you and kiss you.

Mommy has finally made it into the recovery room and I am anxiously awaiting your arrival.
You are still in the nursery and I can barely contain myself. If I could get up and walk to the
nursery, I would but my legs are still numb. I have your Daddy go and check on you to make
sure that all is going well. I am a little upset because I told him not to let you out of his sight.
Finally, they bring you in and Mommy is overcome with emotion. I can't believe how beautiful
you are. You are so perfect! Ten little fingers and ten little toes and perfect little nose. You have
a few "angel kisses" on your left eyelid, your nose, and your upper lip. You have a birthmark on
your forehead that looks like a resting C. You also have the Zybell birthmark on the back of
your neck. You have your Daddy's chin and eyes. You have your Mommy's nose and ears. You
take to the breast immediately and nurse well. Now that I have you in my arms there is no way
that I am putting you down. The nurses keep coming to try to take you to the nursery because
I am having pain and look tired, but not a chance! You are worth every second of pain. What
pain? I don't feel any pain when I have my beautiful baby in my arms!

We finally get to our room and your sister Kristen and Dustin have arrived. Your sister got you a
bib with a zebra on it that says Happy Valentines Day. So cute! Mommy is exhausted and
falling asleep so everyone decides to leave. I have to push your Daddy out the door. I am
worried sick about your brothers. Daddy finally leaves and I get some great quality time with
you alone. I can't look at or touch you enough. I am amazed at how beautiful you are! You are
amazing! The love I have for you.....there are no words to describe it. Baby Donovan, I am so
excited that you are here and healthy! You spend your first night snuggled in my arms and I
couldn't be happier. You nursed almost the whole night. What an amazing experience
welcoming your baby into the world is. I love you so much!

2/13/08
I feel somewhat bad about not documenting this pregnancy, however, it was so uneventful that
there is very little to document. There were very few scans performed and Mommy only went to
the doctor six times. I did have contractions for the last month of pregnancy but that's okay,
you are worth it.

Donovan, I can't tell you how much I love you. Each time that you move, I smile. This is such
an unexplainable feeling and one that I am truly going to miss. You are getting so big that your
head is down in my pelvic region and your little legs are stretching out and going up under
Mommy's ribs. This doesn't feel the greatest, but I know you need to stretch those little legs of
yours so I just reposition myself and let you stretch. You also like to stick up your little arms and
legs and move them across Mommy's tummy. It is amazing to lay there and see something move
from one side of my stomach to the other. Sometimes, you shift your whole body which is really
amazing. I can't believe that this is the last time that I am going to experience this. Mommy
truly loves being pregnant. However, there are a few things about being pregnant that I am not
going to miss. For example, the weight gain, urinary frequency and heartburn. I can't believe
that tomorrow I am going to meet you.

1/14/08
Boys, each and every day you do something that is so adorable that I run for the camera or
video camera. Then, I forget to run for the webpage and you don't know so I am going to
summarize a few of the recent things that you do that are adorable.

You have started to blow kisses. You put your hand to your mouth and kiss your hand and then
send them to Mommy, Daddy, Sissy Kristen or Dustin. You both have finally learned how to
wave properly so when Daddy leaves to go to work, you both go to the door and wave at him
until he is gone. You have both found shoes to be fascinating. You put on Mommy or Daddy's
shoes and walk around the house in them. You have learned to blow on someone's skin and
make farting sounds which sends you both into fits of giggles, as well as the person who you are
doing it to as well. You love to dance and are trying to snap your fingers when you dance....this
is one of your Daddy's dancing moves....we'll have to work on that! Your smiles are enough to
melt any heart and you really know how to pour on the charm. Benjamin, you have learned how
to put your feet in the corner of the tub and do a handstand on the bottom of the tub. You both
have learned how to stand on your head and look back at the people behind you and smile like
you have conquered the world. You have also learned how to kiss each other and everyone
else. This is absolutely adorable. You have also learned how to crawl and walk backwards.
Aunt Pam gave us some bunk beds and you boys hang from the bottom bunk bed and swing as
well. There are so many adorable things that you do every day.

Now, some of the bad things. We are working on not biting and hitting. Not a great trait, but a
developmental milestone we are working through. You have learned to move things over to
achieve the desired height to climb on counters, beds, or whatever you desire. Daddy had
taught you to stand on the living room table and dance, so now any table is considered a
dancing table. Daddy also taught you how to butt heads and now any head is fair game.
Benjamin, you hit so hard that you have bruises on your forehead. Benjamin, you have quite the
little arm on you. You are great at throwing the ball, but do not understand that food is not a toy
to be thrown. You can throw food from the lanai door to the front door. We are definitely
working on that! You also throw you bottles on the floor during meal times. Another
developmental stage we are working on. Other than that, you boys are all hands and curiosity.
You want to touch everything. Mommy feels as though most of the words that come out of her
mouth are don't touch and stop, and Benjamin leave your brother alone.

Boys, you are the joys of Mommy and Daddy's life and we love you very much. Each and day
we look forward to the joy you bring to our lives. We are excited to see you grow and see the
changes, but on the other hand, hate how fast you are growing.

1/11/08
Today is the last day of your binky. Yes, Daddy and I have decided that you are old enough to
find other ways to self soothe and they are "out of here". It is going to be tough going for a
while because you boys really enjoy your binky, but it is time. Success is in the air!

1/1/08
HAPPY NEW YEAR BOYS! The goals for you boys this year are to get you off of your binky,
get you off of your bottles, have you to bed earlier, possibly potty train you both, and love you to
pieces. The last one of these New Years Resolutions should be easy to keep. We have been
trying to wean you off of your binky, but each time we start, some stressful situation comes up
for you boys and well, we give in. Your bottles are difficult because I can't find any sippy cups
that do not leak, therefore, the mess is tremendous. The going to bed early part is also Daddy
and Mommy's fault because we play with you at night, then we want to snuggle and well, it is
9:30 or 10:00 before you get to bed. Even going to bed late, you boys are up at 7:00- 7:30 and
ready to play.

Well my little men, it is another year. You will be shocked at how quickly time flies. Someday, all
too soon, you will be adults, reading this journal and realize how quickly time has passed. I
hope that each and every year your life is filled with as much love and happiness as you
experience now as a child. As adults, it is easy to forget what is important in life and find joys in
the simple things. Take time to tell those you love how much they mean to you. Go watch a
sunrise or a sunset. Life is a precious gift and much too short.

12/25/07
MERRY CHRISTMAS! I can't believe this is already your second Christmas. You are
interested in all the different color lights and ornaments on the tree this year, but mostly, you are
interested in the plug. Mommy has had to slap your hands numerous times to try to keep you
from unplugging and attempting to plug the tree back in. We tore down your play yard and
placed it around the tree to keep you from getting to close and demolishing the tree. It seems to
be working so far.

Aiden, you had your first really serious fall. Daddy and I thought it would be nice to have your
play yard outside on the lanai and give you boys some fresh air. Well, Aiden, you decided that
you did not want to be outside and climbed up to the top of the play yard and then flipped over
the top, landing on the back of your head. You literally had a bump the size of a golf ball on
your head. Mommy almost took you to the emergency room that is how bad it was. So, in the
future, if you are "not quite right", we can trace it back to this fall!

Anyways boys, Merry Christmas! You are the best present that Mommy has ever gotten and I
am so thankful that you are here.

Cooper my little love, I miss you desperately. I put your ornament on the tree and you share a
stocking with Mommy. I wish you were here my little love....but you are forever in my thoughts
and in my heart. I miss you. Merry Christmas my lost love.

12/15/07
Today we went to Gainesville to see your sissy Kristen and Santa. You boys did not like your
experience with Santa this year. Aiden, as soon as you saw Santa, you started to cry.
Benjamin, you were uncertain, but as soon as Aiden started to cry, well, all bets were off. Your
Christmas picture this year is quite humorous. Boys, Mommy loves you both very much. You are
the joys of my life.

12/14/07
Today we had a doctors appointment at USF. Donovan, you are doing great! Both of us are
getting big, both you and mommy. Daddy is like a kid in a candy shop. He can't wait until you
are here, neither can I. We love you so much already!

11/22/07
Today is Thanksgiving and the day that you Aiden, get your first scar. Mommy is trying to
clean up the kitchen as I cook and as I am emptying the dishwasher, right before everyone
gets here, you decide to run through the kitchen at the exact moment that I lower the door. The
door catches you at your right temple and the bleeding starts. It is not that big, probably only 4
mm but a scar just the same.

11/11/07
Today went to the seafood festival. I have to tell you that any time we go somewhere, you boys
draw attention. Today, it was especially true. Here is why...

So, Daddy is pushing you in your stroller and all of a sudden Benjamin you start crying. Well,
Mommy looks to see why and finds you with your fingers in Aiden's mouth and Aiden biting
down. I guess you put your fingers in Aiden's mouth and well, he didn't like it. A number of
people found it quite amusing. You however did not.

Today we also took you boys to the beach for the first time. You boys loved the water and birds.
Benjamin, you chased the birds and tried to catch them. It was so cute to see you trying to
catch the birds. You boys were typical boys and enjoyed the mud as well. We had to strip you
down to your diaper to bring you home you were so dirty.

What a day!

11/02/07
Aiden, you fell out of the bed once last night but did fairly well. I think this is going to work this
time!

11/01/07
Aiden, we are going to start this month off with you sleeping in your big boy bed. You seem to
be ready and Mommy really wants you to be comfortable in your bed before Donovan comes.

Donovan, I can not believe how active you are. You move so much of the time. Anytime Mommy
sits down and relaxes, you start to move. I wonder what you are going to look like and how you
are going to be. Your brothers are exact opposites so it will be interesting to see how you are.

My little Cooper, I miss you!

10/31/07
Well there are two deputy sheriff's in town now. Mommy can't even begin to tell you boys how
adorable you are in your costumes. We didn't go trick or treating but we had errands to run for
the day and you wore your costumes all day. Everyone was constantly commenting on how
adorable you two looked.

10/30/2007
Boyz, today we went to the pumpkin patch to pick out your pumpkins. You two were so cute.
You couldn't decide which pumpkin you wanted and kept running from one row to another.
Benjamin, you were very excited to take each pumpkin and place it outside the patch. One
right after the other.

Aiden, you were so cute. You were trying to climb over the pumpkins and fell and couldn't get
up. All we saw were these little legs kicking in the air. Too cute.

You boys had a great time picking out your pumpkins. What a day!

10/25/07
Aiden, today Mommy went to give you a bath. I turned around to get your toys and the next
thing I knew, you were in the tub. Clothes, diaper and all. You were so cute and proud of
yourself. Of course, Mommy had to get a picture.

Aiden, I have to tell you that you need to stop falling. You keep falling and hitting your head.
You almost constantly have a bruise on your forehead and it really bothers Mommy. I wonder if
your vision or equilibrium is off. I know, I am an overly concerned Mommy, but well, get used
to it.

Benjamin, you are adorable as well. You are both learning so many things. Benjamin, when you
wave, you turn your hand in a circle, counter clockwise. You are starting to make some very
cute facial expressions and put your hands under your chin and smile endearingly. Absolutely
adorable. You have found your shadow and love to chase it, all the while giggling. You have
also learned to dance. You spin around in a circle and shake your hips all the while you are
clapping and laughing.

Aiden, you have found your shadow as well. You however are a little afraid of it and try to run
from it. You get upset when you realize it is still chasing you. You too love to dance and spin in
circles as well. When you clap, you hold your left hand still and hit your right hand to your left
hand. You like to play shy with people and hide behind Mommy's legs. You are afraid of
puppies and dogs and cry when they approach you. You have mastered waving and love to go
to Daddy's study door and wave at him when he is working. He stops whatever he is doing and
smiles and waves at you. Don't tell Daddy I told you, but this makes his day.

Both you boys are learning sign language and can say hungry, thirsty, and please. We will
begin to teach you more soon. You are both chatter boxes as well. You are saying Mommy,
Daddy, Sissy, Kitty, Doggie, Fish, Thunder, Lightning, Shoes, and Dirty. I am sure you are
saying more, but you both have your own little language that makes it difficult for Mommy to
understand.

10/19/07
Today was Daddy and Mommy's anniversary. Sixteen years of marriage and we are still as
much in love with each other as we were when we first met. And now, to make things even
better, we have you boys. It was special having your sisters, but you boys are different in the
fact that we have had you from birth, have you all the time and are happily married. This is
really important. It is funny though how different our lives are now that you boys are here. We
used to go to Bahama Breeze late at night, sit outside and have a few drinks and listen to the
band, then grab dinner around 10 p.m. This is not the situation anymore, however, we wouldn't
change it for the world.

Donovan, we went to the doctor today to listen to your heartbeat. Strong as ever my little man.
You are very active early in the morning and late at night. Mommy loves to feel you moving
around in her tummy. It is one of the benefits of being pregnant. Too bad Daddy can't feel this,
he would enjoy it.

10/08/07
That's it. I surrender. Aiden, you are going back into your crib tonight. You are just not
adjusting to this change well. I think it is too much on your system. You have nausea, vomiting
and diarrhea and are just miserable. You have had many baths today and so has Mommy
because you have thrown up or had diarrhea. Ugh.

10/07/07
Well, last night was no better for sleeping in your toddler beds. Mommy was up every two hours,
if not every hour getting one or both of you back into bed. This is definitely a challenge. Aiden,
you are really struggling with this and we find you all over the bed. You are exhausted and
extremely crabby. Not only that, but you are teething as well. So much fun.

10/06/07
Well, nap time was difficult. We thought night time was difficult, well, trying to get you boys to
sleep during the day in toddler beds is proving just as challenging. You don't want to stay in
your beds. You finally both go to sleep and Mommy is able to catch an hour so I am ready for
tonight.

10/05/07
Today Daddy and I went and bought you boys your first Toddler Beds. Benjamin, you have
been trying to climb out of your crib for a couple of weeks now and it is only a matter of time
before you fall out. We have moved the blue tumbling pads into your room, but still, if you fall,
you could really get hurt. So, toddler beds it is. Let me tell you, this is going to be a challenge.
We put a lock on the outside of your door so that you don't get out of your room in the middle of
the night.

Well, both of you boys fell asleep in Mommy and Daddy's bedroom, snuggling with us, which is
the normal. We put you in your beds and are hoping for the best.

2:00 a.m. Aiden, you have managed to fall out of your bed with a very loud thud, followed by a
blood curling cry. I am not sure who was more startled, you or Mommy and Daddy. We picked
you back up and put you in your bed and you were asleep instantly.

4:00 a.m. Aiden, you are not in your bed. You are lying in the middle of the floor of your
bedroom. Benjamin, you have your head in the bed, but your butt and legs on the floor in a
standing position. This is comical. Daddy is filming you boys. We put you both back into bed
and hope for the best, laughing all the while.

6:00 a.m. Aiden, you are now lying on the tile floor, in front of the closet. Oh boy, what a
challenge this is going to be. Mommy puts you back in bad and contemplates grabbing a
blanket and sleeping on the floor herself. I would if I weren't pregnant and didn't want to start
bad habits.

7:00 a.m. You boys are up and ready to go for the day. Mommy is exhausted. I can't wait until
you take your 10:00 nap so I can catch up on my sleep. What a rough first night you had,
actually, that we all had.

9/20/07
Your Daddy and I were listening to music today and found your name. Donovan Stephen
Zybell. You see, we already have our A, B, and C; so we thought we would keep going down
the alphabet and D it is for you little one. Donovan is a Scottish singer, songwriter and guitarist
from the 60's who developed an eclectic and distinctive style that blended folk, jazz, pop,
psychedelic, and world music. Of course, you get your Daddy's middle name because all of you
boys have it. We didn't want one of you to feel more or less loved so you all got Daddy's name.
Donovan, we don't want you to feel any less loved or special so you get it too.

9/17/07
ANOTHER BOY! Today, we found out that we are having another boy. We are so excited.
Mommy cried and Daddy did too. Daddy also did a happy dance right there in the doctors
office. He was beaming from ear to ear. Mommy cried because I was happy and also because
I was sad. I miss your brother Cooper. There should have been three little boys right from the
start and you baby, should have made four. Please don't think that I wanted you any less, you
are my miracle baby and I am so excited that you are here, but I miss your brother Cooper
terribly.

Your sister Kristen actually called when we were in the doctors office and your Daddy had told
her we weren't going to tell anyone what we were really having, so when he told her you were a
boy, she didn't believe us. She was really excited. Your Daddy couldn't wait to call Omi and
Opa and tell them the good news. They too were excited. They went from having no one to
carry on the family name to having three.

9/10/07
Well Benjamin, you finally did it. You fell over the top of your fenced in play area and landed on
your head. You were trying to reach the television and the next thing I knew, there was a
thump and you were screaming. You have a nice red spot over your right eye and I am sure it
is going to turn into a bruise. You are such a little monkey. I wonder if you have learned your
lesson? Probably not knowing you, but only time will tell.

9/08/07
Today is Mommy's Birthday. While you boys were in the bedroom with Mommy, Daddy heard
me say, "Benjamin, get off your brothers head". He came into the bedroom laughing and asked
if I ever thought that I would be turning 38 and saying those words. I can honestly say "NO!"
However, saying that, I can honestly say that you two boys are the best present Mommy has
ever received. You make my days and nights. Now, to top things off, I have another little one
that I am going to celebrate with.

Every day of my life but especially the special days in my life, I feel as though something is
missing. Cooper my little man, Mommy misses you so much. There is a song that reminds me of
you....

Sunny days seem to hurt the most
Wear the pain like a heavy coat
I feel you everywhere I go
I see your smile, I see your face
I hear you laughing in the rain
Still can't believe you're gone

Chorus:

It ain't fair you died too young
Like a story that had just begun
The death tore the pages all away
God knows how I miss you
All the hell that I've been through
Just knowing no one could take your place
Sometimes I wonder who you'd be today

Would you see the world?
Would you chase your dreams?
Settle down with a family?
I wonder, what would you name your babies?
Some days the sky's so blue
I feel like I can talk to you
And I know it might sound crazy

Chorus

Today, Today, Today
Today, Today, Today

Sunny days seem to hurt the most
I wear the pain like a heavy coat
The only thing that gives me hope
Is I know I'll see you again someday

Someday, Someday

8/27/07
Aiden, yesterday you were so cute! You discovered how to bite your Daddy's nose! Because
we were all laughing, you thought this was absolutely hilarious and bit it many times before
Daddy finally made you stop. Sometimes it is so funny what you come up with. You are our soul
man as well. You love music and dance in a circle stomping your feet. Adorable!

Also yesterday, both you boys were full of kisses for Mommy. You both kiss with your mouth
wide open and make the Mmmm sound as you do it. It was so cute, Aiden you would kiss
Mommy, then Benjamin would turn my head to him for a kiss, then I would kiss Aiden and this
went on for a good five minutes.

Oh, Benjamin, your new fascination is driving your cars on the floor making car sounds. How
cute are you!

I know you boys know it, but your Daddy and I treasure every minute with you. We love you
very much. Oh, don't worry little baby, you are loved just as much! Just wait until you get here.
You won't know what to do with all the hugs and kisses. Counting down the days!

8/23/07
Aiden you finally got your first tooth! How exciting. Mommy had been watching your little gums
become very angry and waiting for that tooth and well, it finally came through. Your first tooth is
your lower left incisor. You are a little more fussy than usual and drooling all the time but in
pretty good spirits otherwise. I wonder if you will be like your brother now and get them in pair
or just one at a time.

8/21/07
Aiden and Benjamin, you are absolutely adorable. Tonight, you were snuggling on the bed with
Mommy and Daddy after your nightly bottle and you leaned over and kissed each other. How
adorable. Each and everyday there is something new. I am glad that we are here to see
everything.

8/20/07
My little boys Aiden and Benjamin. Each day you do things that just fill my heart. Today,
Aiden you started to choke and your little brother came to your aid and started to pat your
back. He then hugged you from behind and then stuck his head over your shoulder to see if you
were okay. How sweet. But don't be fooled, later that same day, he dropped a drum on your
head! You boys are really starting to play well together, well most of the time. Some of the
favorite things you do is to pull things behind you and chase each other. The one toy that you
fight over is a drum with two handles attached. It is amazing to see you interact and play.

You are both running around the house. When I say running, I mean literally running. You
have learned that it is much more fun to divide and conquer than to stay together. This can be
challenging for Mommy. Benjamin, you have learned to open all doors. You go the door, open it
and let Aiden do in first to see if you will get into trouble or not. Daddy and I have been trying
to figure out what to do and have finally come to the conclusion that it is probably necessary to
replace the handles. Oh, the joys of little boys.

You are our precious boys and we love you.

8/13/07
Today Mommy and Daddy went to see Dr. Quintero. Guess what? No subchorrionic hematoma
and no problems. Dr. Quintero expressed that he had very little concerns about the pregnancy.
I might even be able to deliver vaginally. I can finally breathe. After losing Cooper, the
slightest problem is enough to induce sleepless nights and many nightmares. I almost cried
when I saw Dr. Quintero. I definitely have faith in this physician and his skills and
qualifications. I know I am making the right choice by seeing him. So, I have to drive an hour
one way, once a month. Big deal. If it means I can sleep better at night and my baby gets the
treatment it deserves, well, there is nothing I wouldn't do.

As for you little one....you are beautiful. We were really able to get a great look at you. You
had your hands up to your face just like your brother Benjamin for most of the test. You were
active with a heart rate of 175. In one picture, you actually turned and looked at the camera
and waved. Already Mommy and Daddy love you so much. You are our little "love child" and
we are still amazed that you are here. Having had infertility issues for ten years and being told
we would never conceive naturally, you are definitely a welcome surprise. Daddy is still a little
shocked but Mommy is elated. At the next appointment, we get to find out if you are Natalie or
Wyatt. Yes, Mommy is still trying to get Daddy to let us name you Wyatt if you are a boy. Wyatt
Stephen Zybell. If you can't tell, Daddy and I are struggling with a boys name.

7/20/07
Today we went to our second appointment. We finally get to see the baby and make sure that
all is well. Mommy was told that she has a subchorrionic hematoma on her placenta and a cyst
on my left ovary. I was not happy to say the least. The physician informed me that I should not
worry, but of course, the second I got home, I was doing research. A subchorrionic hematoma
used to be called a partial miscarriage! Ugh! Why can't I just have a normal pregnancy. On
top of this, I couldn't tell heads or tail on the ultrasound in regards to the baby. Definitely not
what I am used to. And the icing on the cake was the doctors persistence in regards to having
a pap smear. Hello....I'm pregnant. He was forceful in telling me that it was necessary to make
sure I did not have cervical cancer, but what he failed to realize is that I know that cervical
cancer cannot be treated when pregnant so this is a mute issue. Mommy scheduled an
appointment with Dr. Quintero in Tampa. I go to see him on the 13th. Enough playing around
with the amateurs.

7/11/07
Today we received the HCG levels. They were 38,176. They are rising appropriately. Mommy
got the news while shopping at Wal-Mart in Inverness so I thought I would buy my little "Bug"
something. I bought you something small and what I feel is color appropriate. They say that
Mommy's can tell what they are having and we will see if I am right. I think you are a little girl.
Daddy and Mommy said we really wanted boys when having your brothers, but the thought of
having a little girl is quite exciting for Mommy. I think there are a variety of reasons, but one of
the largest is your brother Cooper. "Bug" Mommy will tell you all about your brother Cooper
when you get older, but in some ways, it would be difficult to have a little boy and not compare
him to Cooper. Whatever sex you are little one, you are already loved so much. Mommy talks to
you every day and rubs her belly where I think you are. Hopefully you feel the love.

7/10/07
Today was Mommy's first visit to the OBGyn. Nothing important happened except for the fact
that they drew HCG levels. We have to wait until tomorrow for the results. We get to see you for
the first time, trans-vaginally on the 20th. Your sister Kristen is coming to see you for the first
time as well.

7/9/07
Today we went to see our little bug for the first time. At first, the nurse was unable to see you
Bug on the ultrasound. Mommy had to fight back the tears. But then, the nurse decided to try a
different angle and there you were with your little heart beating. We think you have been in
Mommy's tummy for about 6 weeks so you are very small. I can't tell you how much your
Daddy and I love you already. We can't wait to find out what sex you are. If you are a girl,
you will be called Natalie Erika Zybell after Natalie Woods (Daddy's favorite actress) and
Oma. We love you little one and can't wait to hold you and kiss you.

7/5/07
You boys are getting to be pro's at boating. We just came back from another week up at Lake
Murray. What fun! We stayed in a small cabin on the lake. It was Daddy, Kristen, Mommy, you
boys and bug. Bug?!? Who is bug? It is your little brother or sister in Mommy's tummy. We just
found out today that he/she was with us when we went to the cabin and has been with us for
about 6 weeks. No, we weren't trying, your little brother or sister is a complete surprise to
Mommy and Daddy and the whole family, however, we are ecstatic. Here is how we found
out....

Mommy hasn't been feeling well for a while but was blaming it on stress and the fact that I had
stopped breastfeeding you boys. Well, we came home from the lake and your Daddy was
changing a wonderfully smelly poopy diaper of yours Benjamin and Mommy almost lost her
lunch. While Daddy finished changing you, Mommy went into her bathroom and found an old
pregnancy test. Immediately after taking the test, positive results showed in the screen. I went
and showed your Daddy and he couldn't believe it. You see, as you boys already know, you
were conceived out of much love and hard work. You were IVF babies and they told Mommy
that I would never be able to conceive naturally. Because of this, Daddy and Mommy called
the company who makes the pregnancy test to see what would cause false positives. We
discovered that the test was expired. So, we went to the store and bought another one. Mommy
came home, took the test and it was instantly positive. Daddy immediately wanted blood work to
confirm so we called Dr. St. Martin and went to the hospital for blood work. This was later in
the evening so we had to wait until morning for the results. You could imagine that Mommy or
Daddy didn't sleep well that night. Anyway, the next morning I called Dr. St. Martin's for the
results but they were not available to take my call, so I called Auntie Pam. She was able to get
me the results and when she called to tell me, she was laughing so hard, I could barely
understand her. Mommies blood levels for HCG were 24,262. Now, depending on how far
along I am, this could mean multiples but it definitely confirms pregnancy. Mommy is so
EXCITED! I wanted another baby so badly. I had just gotten rid of all my maternity items
and infant items a couple of weeks before, but not without first begging your Daddy for more
babies. He was quick to reply, "Only if a miracle occurs". Well, here is my little Miracle. I AM
SO EXCITED!

We also had something else pretty exciting happen today. Dustin, Kristen's boyfriend called
Daddy and Mommy to see if we would give our permission for him to ask Kristen to marry him.
WOW! Two big events in one day. Of course, we said yes. He said he was going to ask her on
their one year anniversary, but Mommy laughed knowing that Dustin cannot keep a secret. I
wonder how soon he will ask her.

So boys, you have a new brother or sister on the way and your Big Sister Kristen is engaged.
What a day.

6/23/07
Another party to celebrate you boys. This time, Dominque and her family came and Linda and
her family. These are friends from Mommy's old job. Boys, when you look back at your baby
pictures, you will see that Dominique, Kaleena, and Sareena came over to see you when you
were first born. You boys had fun playing with the Sareena and Andrew. You are still learning
not to pull hair Benjamin, but that takes time. Every time you pull hair, we pull yours. You don't
like this too much, and we don't like doing it to you, so hopefully this habit will end quickly.

Well boys, you have one party left. This is one with Aunt Pam and her family. I think we will
just have a whole month of celebrating your birth. This is how this month has turned out, but that
is just fine with Mommy. I celebrate your birth every day. Each and every day you do
something so adorable that I can't imagine loving you more, and yet each day I do.

6/17/07
Boys, you had grown up cake today and let me tell you, you made a mess. I had just got your
chairs cleaned from last night and Daddy said you needed to have a piece of grown up cake.
Well, you both thought this was a great idea and went completely crazy. You had cake
everywhere; on yourselves, the floor, the doors.....everywhere. Of course, Mommy has pictures.
We also video taped this. You had so much fun. Benjamin, you stopped eating with your hands
and just decided to put your face down into the cake to eat. Once your cake was done, you
decided to try to eat the plate. Absolutely, 100% adorable. After you both destroyed your
cakes, you were taken directly to the bathtub. There you played and Mommy attempted to get
the cake out of your ears, nose and hair. Unfortunately, I was unsuccessful because later that
night, I was still pulling cake out of your hair and ears.

Well boys, Mommy and Daddy celebrate you being here daily. Each night we snuggle with you
and are amazed that you are here and as adorable as you are. We are so thankful. Aiden and
Benjamin, Mommy and Daddy love you more than the moon.

6/16/07
Today is your Birthday Party! Yeah what fun. Daddy, Mommy, Kristen, Dustin, Stephanie,
Heather (friend of Kristen and someone who has given you toys and pajamas from her son),
Chrissy and Dylan, and Debbie and Alan were here to celebrate. Dominique and her family got
lost and called but Mommy's cell phone was broken so I did not get her message. We had a
cookout with steak and chicken kabobs on the grill with vegetables, corn on the cob, salad,
home made Italian bread, baked beans, vegetable platter and crackers and cheese. Oh, and
Chrissy brought pasta salad and deviled eggs and olives. Everything was very good. Mommy
made you boys each a special teddy bear cake. Now, let me tell you, I was very surprised at
how each of you reacted to your cakes. Aiden, you always tough everything with one finger
before touching more of it.....not this time. We put the cake in front of you and you almost
instantly stuck your hand in it. Benjamin, you were the one who touched it with one finger. It
was extremely funny to watch you boys eat cake. Of course Mommy has pictures...are you
surprised?

You both received really great presents. Mommy and Daddy got you a phone that you can pull
around and that makes noise, stackable rings, and a bead maze. Mommy took you shopping
and these were the things that really attracted you in the store. Your sister Kristen bought you a
remote control that spoke English, Spanish and French and a drum. This was really neat for
you because you both enjoy beating on things and love remote controls. Your sister Stephanie
bought you a swim set that had bottoms and a hat. This was really great because of going to the
lake and all the time that we spend in the pool. Chrissy got you a drum set as well but it was
different than the one that Kristen got you. She also got you a xylophone that has a slot for balls
that you hammer down that make noise. You love it. And Debbie and Alan bought you two
adorable baseball outfits and two books that make noise. You boys love the books. Uncle
Andreas, Aunt Cheryl and Cousin Sara sent you each a teddy bear that is recordable. They
recorded themselves saying Happy Birthday to you. They also sent you each an outfit. Oma
and Opa sent you $25.00 and Daddy and Mommy are going to invest that for you along with
the money from Grandma Bev who sent you $20.00. Today was not about presents, it was
about celebrating with friends your first year. These are all people who have been a part of
your first year.

6/15/07
Today you boys went to see Dr. St. Martin. It has been a while since you saw him and he was
surprised to see you both walking. Both of you are starting to recognize the smell and sounds of
the doctors office and you don't like it.

Aiden, your first trip to Dr. St. Martin's office was on 6/28/06 and at that time, you were 18
inches long, weighed 4 lb 4 oz, and had a head circumference of 12 inches. Today, you are 28
3/4 inches long, weigh 17 lbs 8 oz, and have a head circumference of 17.75 inches. You have
grown so much in your first year. However, the doctor says that you could stand to put on some
weight.

Benjamin, your first trip to Dr. St. Martin's office was also on 6/28/06 and at that time, you
were 18 1/4 inches long, weighed 5 lbs 10 oz, and had a head circumference of 13.25 inches.
Today, you are 29 3/4 inches long, weigh 19 lbs 4 oz, and have a head circumference of 18.25
inches. You too have grown so much in your first year.

I am amazed at how quickly you boys have grown. Enough is enough. I wish I had a rewind
button. It is so unfair that you boys are growing up so quickly, however, we are all very
fortunate that Mommy is able to stay at home with you. You have only been sick, really sick
once. You have had two small colds but only been truly sick with nausea and diarrhea once.
That was enough for Mommy. I felt that during that week, all I did was change diapers and
clean up vomit. It was not fun but your Daddy was very helpful in comforting you and helping.
I hope that you boys appreciate your Daddy. It is a shame that you do not remember your
infancy. Your Daddy and Mommy snuggle with you in our bed every night before you go to
sleep. You get your evening meal in our bed, your binky and then you snuggle with Mommy and
Daddy until you fall asleep. Your Daddy plays with you every day. He tickles you, throws you
in the air, and oh, one of your favorite things that he does is roaring like a lion. You both giggle
and run away. It is extremely cute. Aiden, you have started to run around the house roaring
like Daddy. It is adorable. I just know what it has been like with your sisters and dread the
day that conflict occurs between your Daddy, Mommy and you boys. It really breaks a parents
heart when conflict occurs with their children. It is a shame that you boys will not remember all
the times that Daddy and I cared for you and provided you unconditional love. It never
changes, the unconditional love, but sometimes it seems to be misunderstood. Just remember
that your Mommy and Daddy love you more than the moon.

6/14/07
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AIDEN AND BENJAMIN! YOU ARE ONE YEAR OLD
TODAY! I can't believe that you are one year old. It seems like just yesterday that I found
out that I was pregnant and wow, here it has already been a year. It doesn't seem possible
that only a year ago, Mommy was in labor with you. I remember it like it was yesterday and it
feels as though it was yesterday. You boys have grown so much! This year has been one of the
best of Mommy's life. I love you so much! For your birthday, Daddy, Kristen, Stephanie and
you boys had a quiet night at home. We had hamburgers on the barbeque and just celebrated
you boys being here and being healthy. We are planning a party with friends on Saturday.

Aiden and Benjamin, your family loves you so much. We are all so excited that you are here,
healthy and happy. You are such wonderful little boys. Happy Birthday! Mommy loves you very,
very much.

Happy Birthday Cooper. Your Mommy loves you very much and I miss you.